IN THE BEGINNING

I STAND AT THE EDGE OF ETERNITY AND PEER INTO THE VASTNESS OF NOTHINGNESS. IT IS COLD, SO VERY COLD. IT IS DARK, DARKER THAN ANY MIDNIGHT I HAVE EVER SEEN. THE DARKNESS IS A WALL, IT LAYS LIKE A BLANKET ON MY SKIN AND STRETCHES TO THE UTMOST HORIZONS OF MY MIND. IT IS EMPTY, ITS EMPTINESS IS A VACUUM THAT SEEMS TO REACH OUT WITH ICY, CLUTCHING FINGERS TO SNATCH THE VERY LIFE FORCE OUT OF ME. THE EMPTINESS IS BEYOND ANYTHING I HAVE EVER DREAMED OF, THE ABSOLUTE VOID OF NOTHINGNESS STARES BACK AT ME. THE PAIN OF REALIZATION IS AN ECSTASY OF AGONY. EVERY THOUGHT IS REFLECTED BACKWARD INTO MY MIND, I DO NOT PROJECT ANY VESTIGE OF MYSELF BEYOND MYSELF.

THERE IS NOTHING.

HOW LONG I STOOD THERE IMPALED BY THE STARKNESS OF ETERNITY I DO NOT
KNOW. MY FIRST AWARENESS WAS A KIND OF SENSE THAT THERE WAS A PRESENCE IN THE MIDST OF THE BLACKNESS. AN EERIE KIND OF FEELING AS IF THERE WAS A DENSITY IN THE MIDST OF THE BLACKNESS. SOMETHING WAS OUT THERE! AS I BECAME EVER MORE CERTAIN OF IT A SENSATION OF PRESSURE BEGAN TO GROW
OUT OF THE BLACKNESS.

SOMETHING WAS OUT THERE!

MY ARMS TINGLE WITH HOT PIN POINTS OF ANXIETY, A SHIVER OF ANTICIPATION RUNS UP AND DOWN MY BACK, I CAN HEAR EACH DISTINCT HEART BEAT IN MY HEAD AS THE BLOOD RUSHES TO MY BRAIN IN THE INTENSITY OF THE EXCITEMENT.

SOMETHING IS OUT THERE!

IN THE MIDST OF THE DARKNESS IT SEEMS TO COALESCE. SUDDEN CERTAINTY GRIPS ME LIKE A VISE. AT FIRST THE PRESENCE SEEMED LIKE A DISTANT POINT, SOMETHING FAR AWAY IN THE VORTEX OF THE DEEPER DARKNESS. AS I STOOD THERE I BECAME AWARE OF ANOTHER HEARTBEAT, TEADY, RHYTHMIC, AND AWESOMELY POWERFUL. IT SEEMED TO REACH OUT TO ME FROM AN IMMENSE DISTANCE, AND YET I COULD FEEL THE POWER OF IT AS IT BEGAN TO ECHO OFF MY MIND. IT SEEMED TO PRESS UPON ME A PRESSURE LIKE THE DEPTHS OF THE SEA. I COULD FEEL IT BEGIN TO PRESS UPON MY SKIN, SLOWLY, INEXORABLY, CREEPING BETWEEN ME AND THE DARKNESS THAT LAY UPON ME. FEAR WAS A PALPABLE THING, THE ACID COPPER TASTE OF FEAR WAS EVERYWHERE.

SOMETHING IS OUT THERE!

NOW THE PRESENCE SEEMS TO RUSH AT ME FROM A FAR DISTANCE, DEEP IN THE DARKNESS, IT IS COMING TOWARD ME AT AN UNBELIEVABLE VELOCITY, EATING UP THE VASTNESS OF THE DISTANCE BETWEEN US. ITS VELOCITY BECOMES A HUGE MASS, HURTLING TOWARD ME WITH A IRRESISTIBLE PURPOSE. AT THE LAST INSTANT I THROW OUT MY ARM - AND - TOUCH THE HAND OF GOD!

AT THE INSTANT OF IMPACT, I FINALLY KNOW GOD AS I WAS MEANT TO KNOW HIM. AWESOME, GREAT, ALL ENCOMPASSING, THE ONE, THE ONLY TRUE FORCE IN A VAST UNIVERSE OF NOTHINGNESS. MY HEART SURGES WITHIN ME AS I GRASP THE HAND OF GOD WITH A GRIP OF URGENT DESPERATION. IT IS THEN I HEAR THE VOICE THAT MOVES THE VERY FOUNDATION OF MY SOUL, AND I FEEL THE UNIVERSE TREMBLE FROM ITS POWER ! THUS HATH GOD SAID - LET THERE BE LIGHT ! AND THERE WAS LIGHT! AND HE CALLED THE LIGHT –

JESUS!

WILLIAM EVERYMAN 1988

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